I missed October

Today is the 28th of October and I feel as though I've lived one continuous day for the past 20 days. Our little baby girl, Eleanor Grace, was born on Friday, Oct. 8th at 3:16pm, 7 lbs 12 oz. The experience of giving birth is something I still cannot wrap my mind around. I would like to take a few postings to describe my experience of the labor and delivery in order to keep the memory.

Labor started late Thursday night, after watching Private Practice. Ken and I went up to our room and he gave me one of my much-needed massages as I tried to stay comfortable those last days of pregnancy. I had been having contractions all day, but really, I had been having contractions for the past couple of weeks. Some more intense than others. I decided to take a bath because the warm water usually calms them down. However, with "real" labor, it speeds them up. I called for Ken to come in to the bathroom and time some of them (as I said some not too pleasant things) and at midnight, they were 2-3 minutes apart, lasting for 45-90 seconds each. Usually, women go to the hospital when contraction get close, like 5 minutes apart, so I kept wondering if they'd slow down (ha ha). At 3am, I was starting to get more tired, and the contractions kept coming every 2-3 minutes. I asked Ken to start loading the car because now I really felt like these weren't going away! I finally realized that it was going to be the day we were to meet our girl. Since it was the middle of the night, I remembered that I was supposed to eat something before going to the hospital because after admission, food is not really allowed. So, I had Ken get the pan of Rice Krispie Treats that I had made and between cussing (I mean, the contractions), I ate Rice Krispie bars as we drove to the hospital. I think I had 15 contractions during the car ride, not fun. I walked in to the birth center with Ken, and we got right in to our room (they were expecting us since we called our OB doctor). I also remember feeling bad about waking up Tara (our doula) to come to the hospital. I kept thinking, maybe this isn't labor yet. When we got to our room, my nurse checked my progress from the labor and I was 6 cm. dilated. I was a little shocked, only 4 more cm. to go before birth. I knew, on average for first time moms, it would take approximately one and a half hours for each centimeter, so surely by 10am we would be ready to push the baby out.

Tara arrived shortly after we got settled into our hospital room. One of the great things about our hospital is the laboring tubs in the room. I was able to get into the tub which helped manage the intensity of the contractions. They even had a mobile, cordless fetal monitor that allowed me to be in the water for over an hour. Thinking back, both Ken and Tara were right with me, helping me focus on deeply breathing and relaxing through the contractions. After about six hours of these contractions (from midnight or 11pm, I can't remember exactly) I started to feel more and more exhausted, and, to me, the hardest part of transition was just around the corner. I decided to go with an epidural, knowing that it would take a little while to get things set up and get the medication in place. I did consider having an unmedicated birth (i.e., no epidural), but the combination of exhaustion (I had been awake since 8:30am the day before) and some fear of the intensity of the birth helped me decide. Even after getting the epidural, I was still having a significant amount of discomfort, so I actually had a different epidural placed, and that one took two attempts to get placed properly. I remember that Ken left the room because he really doesn't like needles, so Tara stayed with me. In fact, I hardly remember having the discomfort of having the procedure done due to having to manage the contractions! What a trip. Honestly, re-reading what I just wrote, it sounds way worse than what I remember. I am amazed at the capacity of the body to cope and handle all of the changes of birthing a baby. I was thankful for the epidural. I was a little surprised at how much I could still feel the entire process, just minus feeling my uterus contract.

As I write this, I realize that I need to write it for myself. I really don't care if anyone else wants to read it or cares much about my experience, but I know for Ken and me, we need to remember the events of birthing our baby Eleanor. Right now, I have my computer on my lap and baby is sleeping, snuggled under my chin as I recline in the recliner. The birth seems like a distant memory, but a memory not to be forgotten. All for now. Must change a diaper.